What If You Weren’t A-Scared of Death?

My favorite bailiwick is to squash the fear of death.
According to my dead relatives, “Death is like crossing the street, no big deal.”

How does life change when we know for sure that we do not die? That we simply move on to another realm, wearing our ethereal body instead of our dense physical body?
(This is not the first time you’ve heard it. Nor the last.)

People around the world tell similar stories when they come back from their near-death experience (NDE). An international survey says 4% to 15% of us have died, revived, and remembered an NDE.
Invariably this changes our life, transforms our outlook and our priorities.

Just take a moment to imagine you are fine with dying.
Let yourself know, way down in your core, that you, the real you, will advance to new places.
You will never die.
How does your earth life change?

There are no threats. Nobody can threaten you with death, because you don’t care. (Being in a hostage situation is no fun, but at the same time, terrorists would lose their leverage.)
No terror, no problem . . .

Would we still have wars?
What’s the point in killing each other?
I’ve read accounts of World War II soldier enemies shooting each other, then arising from their dead bodies to meet and shake hands. This blows my mind. How much hugging is going on, spirits hugging with relief and elation and forgiveness, right there on the battlefield?
Right there automatically they understand love, not war.

If we know for sure that death is no big deal, we won’t get so nervous and spend so much time, energy, and money, trying to hold it off.

We won’t be so stressed!

How relaxed will you be when you know there’s no time limit, no deadline (wink, wink)?
How relaxed can we get as we approach our physical demise?
Can we be okay with it?

A million intensive care nurses including myself have declared that we want a tattoo that says “Do not resuscitate,” because we’ve seen the long drawn-out unnecessary expenditure of pain and heartache and confusion dragging on for months or years after a slightly successful resuscitation.
(Okay, okay, on the other hand if we didn’t resuscitate people we might not have so many accounts of NDEs. I’ll give you that.)

Lots of correlating data has amassed from case studies of NDE.
Most people meet dead relatives, friends and/or spiritual masters, see vivid colors and/or celestial landscapes, have an altered sense of time and nonlocal space, feel great peace, harmony, and joy. They return to Earth with new insight.

Their life is utterly transformed.
Life is no longer the same as it was.
Life is more precious than ever.
There’s a radical change in personality and attitude. (Like with Ebenezer Scrooge, remember?)
Malignant illnesses disappear, and there’s less pain for the rest of their life.

Researchers say these survivors have lower blood pressure, lower body temperature, and a slower metabolic rate.
They need less sleep and have more energy.
Their senses are sharpened with a deeper appreciation of smells, tastes, touches.
They are more sensitive to light, sound, noise, and they can no longer handle much alcohol or pharmaceuticals.
Some studies say their mental abilities increase.

The most dramatic shifts happen in attitude, bringing in new values and life goals.
They feel awake to their own life,
feel a reverence for all life,
feel they are surrounded and filled with divine energy.
These people live more deeply and more purposefully than ever.
They are humble and self aware, with more tolerance and compassion for others.

They are now “immune to society’s fear-mongering about death,” Julia Assante PhD writes in The Last Frontier: Exploring the Afterlife and Transforming Our Fear of Death. (Much of the material on this page is paraphrased from Assante.)

Assante observes that these people come into a broad view, moving into “a more universalist spirituality” rather than an Orthodox religious mindset.
They feel certain a supreme being or benevolent source exists. (Even atheists come to this conclusion.)
They understand that every person on the planet plays a vital role here.
They know love is the most important thing, always and ever.

Many experience an increase in psychic abilities.
Studies say that up to 65% feel they have developed the gift of healing, and they open to new careers as counselors, massage therapists, health practitioners.

So what do you think of all this?
Do tell.

Here’s one of my personal affirmations:
“No rush, baby. We have all the time in the worlds. We have forever.”


Death?  No such thing.  part 1
Death No Such Thing part 2
After-life News to Charm and Enliven Your Heart  
Blow Away the Veil to the Next World and Cheer Up

Diane Stallings RN does health coaching, energy healing, and gives you practical ways to enhance your wellbeing.  Make an appointment in Phoenix or Fountain Hills. Inquire about our weekly healing class, Tuesday evenings in Phoenix. Free meditation classes in Fountain Hills.
(Thanks to pixabay for this image.)
away-bridge spirit pixabay

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Want to Drop the Mask and Try Honest?

Romantic love has been a freaking confusion for me, I admit it.
Decades ago I thought the appropriate thing was to adore my partner.
I thought adoration equals love.
But who can hold up under that much adoration?
We’re only human, and we’re bound to fall.

I thought loving my partner meant feeding his ego, telling him he was great, loading him up with compliments. Yup, good approach, right? Praise and compliments are important.
On the other hand it was a little contrived.

Too much emotional caretaking is exhausting.  I mean, if I try to deal with others’ emotions and take responsibility, try to shore them up, patch up their feelings?
That’s not for me to do.
That’s invasive.
That’s not my business.
That’s crazy.
It leaves me all strung out and teaches them to suck on my energy.

After decades now, I find that when I live my truth,
when I do what I love and love what I do,
I feel tons of freedom and tons of love.
I get in alignment with my own heart, and it feels delicious.
In being true to myself, I float straight into the love vibration.
Love naturally extends from me to everyone, to my partner, to all I see.

You’ve been there too, I’m sure.

When I’m loving my life, I’ve tapped into the source of love.
I’m standing in an ocean of love.

The place I get stuck is the old “people pleaser” habit.
My old recording says, “Sure Honey, whatever you want, burgers again.”
Or “I know this means a lot to you so I’ll go along” (even though I find it stifling).
Or “I’m fine,” when really I’m a wreck of dismay, anger or revenge.

Yeah. Darn it all. There’s that.

Of course compromises happen in partnership.
But even so, why do we squash ourselves just to be nice?

Why does it feel like such an act of bravery to tell it like it is, to say what I’m really feeling or what I really want?
Because indeed it is an act of courage.

Since childhood we’ve been trying to perform well, to show our good side, not our bad side.
We worry that the other person won’t like us.
We’re attached to their opinion, their judgment of us.

We withdraw, we fudge the truth, we clam up, we fake it a little, we perform well instead of revealing our truth in the moment.

You know the scenario – most of us do this.
It blocks real connection.

If both parties are wearing a mask, how will they ever truly see each other?
This is dreadfully dissatisfying.
This is slow starvation.
This is so human of us.
It is okay. Seeing it is the first step.

I hope to shift into accurate truth more often.
I hope to slow down enough to notice the instant I hide myself.
Notice the moment the mask pops up.

If we cultivate our true self and love our whole self, warts and all, then it’s easier and more natural to be truthful.

We can express our feelings in a kind way.
Simply our feelings – without opinions, defenses, or judgments.
Feelings are not right or wrong – they’re just energy.
I voice my feelings; you voice yours. We let their energy come and go.

This leads to real connection with others.
This leads to a feast of love.
I have seen a few people actually doing this. It blows my mind.

I am aiming for gentle bald honesty. Expressing my feelings with kindness and respect.

If you have any hints for me and for others, please share them.

We need it now more than ever.

How Do I Love Me?
3 Heart-Full Steps to Find More Love

Diane Stallings RN does energy healing and gives you practical ways to enhance your wellbeing.  Make an appointment in Phoenix or Fountain Hills. Inquire about our weekly healing class, Tuesday evenings in Phoenix. Free meditation classes in Fountain Hills.
(Thanks to Max Pixel for this image.)

relationship energy Max Pixel

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Love is Listening and How to Do That Maybe

In this Valentine month how can we sweeten our relationships in ways that truly matter?
Relationship can be the most challenging thing on the planet.
It is not easy, especially for long-term relationships.

I have found my best help through the emotion-focused work of Dr. Sue Johnson and her book, Hold Me Tight.

Yet I’m always working on loosening up,
not taking things personally,
trying to allow me to be me, and my partner to be my partner.
Allowing is a super big deal.

The skill of good listening is essential.
Good listening conveys not only love but healing upon the speaker.
Good listening is balm for the soul.

Have you ever met a good listener?
The first true listener I met amazed me.
Has a true listener ever happened to you?
What was it like?

Some years ago I followed a suggestion to
just breathe and fully focus on listening for 30 seconds.
You can do that. It may grow longer. But even if you stay at the 30-second mark, your love will grow.
It actually worked.

My friend Bernadette Wesley teaches about “Circle Talk” for deep listening, compassion, and connection. Check her out.

She referred me to a wondrous TEDx talk on The Power of Listening
presented by Leon Berg,  whose home page (Tools for Togetherness)
says, “Imagine a relationship that grows throughout time . . .”
That line itself warms my heart.

Berg emphasizes that real listening is vital for friends and partners – even more vital for enemies.

If we let go of our tight agenda,
if we hold our personal views a little loosely,
if we can allow and take in the other,
love becomes more possible than ever.

Currently I’m taking an online class, Intimacy Without Responsibility. It’s helping me become more aligned with allowing.

Some of my favorite encouragements from this class are:
I let go of thinking that I must take care of someone.
I permit myself to love others without taking responsibility for their happiness.
I will no longer take responsibility for your feelings.
I release any feelings of fear that I must do something to make a situation safe or comfortable.
You are accountable for you and I am accountable for me.
I feel gratitude now for all we have learned together
I am committed to telling you my truth in a loving way.
I will not take responsibility for your reactions.
I will take responsibility for my reactions.
I am free to be real in our relationship.
I am willing to heal and transform my triggers.
I let go of needing to be right.
I truly honor that our perceptions are different.

How does all this work for you?
Any insights or hints you can share with us will be so appreciated.
This topic is my biggest personal challenge, I feel. 😉


3 Heart-Full Steps to Find More Love
How do I love me? One Vital Breakthrough

Diane Stallings RN does health coaching, energy healing, and gives you practical ways to enhance your wellbeing.  Make an appointment in Phoenix or Fountain Hills. Inquire about our weekly healing class, Tuesday evenings in Phoenix. Free meditation classes in Fountain Hills.
(Thanks to pixabay for this image.)
attend-hold blue sky pixabay


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If I Were a Ghost by Rod Drought

Deep thanks to my friend, poet Rod Drought, for this delicious guest post.
This is a sneak peek into his next book of poetry.

If I Were a Ghost

I would not haunt,
Rattle chains across your floor
Instead I would give an ethereal tap on
Your shoulder so light you might not notice
Just enough to stop you from texting,
To break the trance
Unlock your stare from the cage
Of an insignificant screen
An imperceptible nudge to lift your eyes
To awaken with wonder once again
Catching your breath noticing the sheen
Of ice on barren trees, on telephone lines
The brilliant and blinding reflection
Of a winter sun after the storm

I would hover like a bee around a stamen
So that you would flower from the mundane,
The doldrums of a grocery excursion
In a casual glimpse you would pause, appreciate
The unsteady gait of an elderly couple
Making their way to senior day at Goodwill
Their weathered hands clasped, rooted together

When times are hard
I would be the light
That defines your shadow then
I would rise, be your noon
Eclipse with time all your sorrow

I would want to be there
To see you live your life
Without ghosts, without interference
Freedom my diaphanous gift
As I stay by your side
You may feel a warm blush
On your tender face
A sweet, mysterious comfort
That flutters by your ear
A whisper of love
When you need it the most
You might never see me
But you will know
I am always there

©Rod Drought – January 2019

rod ghostly on forest-sunlight by pexels

You can find more of Rod’s refreshing poetry in his three books (and e-books):
 The Song We Left Behind,
The Wake of The Desert Belle
, and
The Adventurers and other poems
Thanks for this inspiration, Rod!


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Biofield Tuning: Amazing, Remarkable, the Next Great Thing for You

Dear Friends, I can’t wait to tell you about Biofield Tuning, a (new to me) healing method that uses sound vibrations to clear and refresh the human energy field, right down into the nervous system of the body.

The human electromagnetic field, shaped like a donut of energy, flows up the center and fountains out around the edges. This is called a toroidal shape or torus.
Planet Earth also is enveloped in such a torus of energy. (As is the sun and each planet.)

Just as the Earth has a standing wave or vibration called the Schumann resonance, we humans too carry standing waves of energy in our field.

In this wellness method developed by Eileen Day McKusick, we comb through a person’s field using a tuning fork.

Let’s remember that the entire world is composed of vibration and energy.
It is hard for us to grasp this idea, but it’s true.
Everything is energy. Nothing is truly solid.
Each thing in the world carries its own signature frequency (vibration).

Inside a person’s field the tuning fork easily encounters tangles or small clouds of difficult energy – old events and tough moments from childhood and throughout one’s life.
As we know, we still subconsciously spend energy on our old events and traumas. When we think about them they drag us down; they burden us.
They suck our energy because we left unresolved energy in them.

In this super cool tuning process, the tuning fork harmonizes and untangles the trauma.
It does this vibrationally.

The tone, the note, the megahertz entrains that cloudy part of your field into harmony. It neutralizes the fear, sadness, angst and every emotion, transmuting it into simple basic energy that you can use.
With the tuning fork we bring this energy back into your body (and into your chakras which process and organize body-energy).

You become stronger and more balanced. Happier.

The older we get, the more we carry burdens from our past. This method dissolves the burdens and gives us new understandings about our life events. We gain new learning from every decade.
Releasing an old burden can improve our health dramatically, in some cases.

In particular Biofield Tuning has improved thyroid imbalances, diabetes, MS, Parkinson’s, depression and bipolar disorder.

My friends and I are delighted with the way this method clears up old issues even after years of inner work.
After receiving a session I feel totally altered and reset.
Tuning is strong stuff.
It turns over a new leaf for me.
My life opens up even more.
More ease and flow and joy.

Have you tried it? How did it feel for you?

You’ll find more inspiring data and more practitioners at biofieldtuning.com.
(Did you know all of our cells have tiny antennae that take in and react to sound?)

Biofield tuning is transformative, truly.
Message me if you would like to experience a taste of it.

Meanwhile check out this 15 min body tuning info video presented by McKusick at the 2015 SAND Conference (Science and Non-duality).

Let us know what you think.

Have fun!


For another easy way to use sound healing on yourself, see How to Heal Yourself (Free!) with Your Astounding Voice 

Diane Stallings RN does health coaching, energy healing, and gives you practical ways to enhance your wellbeing.  Make an appointment in Phoenix or Fountain Hills. Inquire about our weekly healing class, Tuesday evenings in Phoenix. Free meditation classes in Fountain Hills.
(Thanks to pxhere and pixabay for these combined images we enhanced. Red cloud “tangles” are cleared and restored here to a golden 3rd chakra.)
bt field torus pxhere w human lightbody pixabay

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How to Help Cracked Fingertips Get Better 

The colder it gets, the dryer it gets, and the more skin cracks on fingertips, knuckles, and heels. Basically the skin dries out and shrinks, opening up fissures and cracks.
Dryness worsens when we deplete our skin oils by frequent hand-washing.
(Don’t quit washing the hands in the germy season, but cover up with gloves for warm hands, less washing.)

7 tips to repair split skin:

Liquid bandage – If the skin is already split and hurts like the devil, paint on a liquid bandage like New-Skin.
Some people use super glue. But in a deep crack, super glue might be toxic. (You may not want super glue chemicals straight into your bloodstream.)
New-Skin smells like clear fingernail polish to me. It might be a little toxic. But hey, when my finger’s in pain I do reach for that liquid bandage. Great relief.

Look up the toxins in your products at ewg.org/skindeep. (They don’t list New-Skin, but its main ingredient is an antibacterial antiseptic the ewg considers moderately toxic. The inactive ingredients are non-toxic cellulose and several varieties of acetate which probably form the bandage.)

Hydrate like crazy! Do not get unwittingly dehydrated! (As most of us are!)
Drink at least a gallon a day. High-mineral celtic salt with your water gives you plump healthy cells. See Watercure for all the scoop.

Cover up with gloves whenever possible and socks for those heels.

Eat Silicon, a.k.a. Silica.  Studies from the  NIH (National Institutes of Health) say silicon enhances the synthesis of collagen to improve skin strength and elasticity.
(OSA – orthosilicic acid – is the most bio-available form of silicon according to the NIH.)
Our bones, skin and teeth naturally have silicon, but maybe not enough.
Food sources of silicon/silica are whole grains, oatmeal, bran cereals.

Silica/silicon supplements often contain horsetail or bamboo extract, good sources.
The recommended dose is 55 micrograms per day.
(Besides repairing skin, this is claimed to prevent wrinkles and promote thick hair. All I know is, some winters I have avoided cracked skin entirely by taking silicon.)

Eat Coconut Oil. A good antioxidant that reduces free radicals and aging, coconut oil heals and strengthens the skin from the inside out. Its fatty acids fortify connective tissue.
Many people take several teaspoons a day to treat psoriasis, eczema, and diminish wrinkles. (On the other hand, heart doctors are not keen on its saturated fat. Personally I think it might be worthwhile for a couple of cold months in winter. Follow your own guidance.)

Moisturize often. Be choosy about lotions because some contain alcohol (drying), parabens (hormone-damage), and toxic chemicals. Again check your products at ewg.org.
Moisturizers I like are coconut oil, jojoba oil, and Aquaphor ointment (similar to petroleum jelly).
(My face gets grape seed oil because it is non-comedogenic – doesn’t block pores.)

Do a Night Treatment. Apply a deep moisturizer like petroleum jelly to your hands and feet, then cover up with cotton socks and gloves through the night. Beautiful skin in the morning.

Whaddaya say? Can you share more ideas?
All of the above tips have helped me for sure.
Let us know your thoughts.

Diane does health coaching, energy healing, and gives you practical ways to enhance your wellbeing.  Make an appointment in Phoenix or Fountain Hills. Inquire about our weekly healing class, Tuesday evenings in Phoenix.
(Thanks to public domain for this image.)
cracked-skin-face public domain


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Waking Up Sophie, a colorful story to Inspire You

Bleary-eyed, Sophie awakened from a dream where a ton of sweet soft marshmallows buried her six feet deep. Every pastel color and size, a delightful mushy smorgasbord piled up into her narrow rectangular space. Then they shifted from delight to danger. They smothered her. The little ones squished into her nose.

She awakened with a dry mouth and a stuffy nose, betrayed and bewildered.
What a drag to smother underneath her own sinuses again. Likely from all the chips she ate last night. Congestion followed her high-carb binges.
Comfort food – what a lie.

She wanted more comfort. She needed more comfort.
Sometimes she felt strong enough to function and sometimes she didn’t.
One flight of stairs put her out of breath. Carrying groceries into the house made her sweat. These days she watched her strength dwindling, her muscles going mushy.

She couldn’t fight it. It was all part of aging, right?
The memory of her wiry Phys Ed mother filled her head.
Mom used to say, “Get up and go! Work it!”

“Bad idea, Mom,” Sophie said aloud. On her last visit to the gym she’d thrown out her back, nearly got trapped into surgery. No thanks. She didn’t have the energy to set foot in the gym.
Mom had died young, anyhow.

“You got a body, take care of it,” Mom’s voice snapped loudly in the air.
What? Auditory hallucination? Mom-in-the-head never said that before.

Sophie’s hands trembled, opening the toothpaste. “Don’t scare me, Mom.”
First a grave of marshmallows and now ghost-mom? Please. Don’t wreck my Saturday morning.
Deep breath.

“Okay, listen. I will – take a walk. It’s almost a mile over to Walmart. They have veggies. I’ll make a big salad for lunch. Okay?”

At the end of the second block Sophie gasped for breath, dizzy but determined. She heard a truck behind her, but she had the crosswalk and the light in her favor. The moment she stepped off the curb, the truck lurched across her lap in a tight right turn. A big muscled plumber painted on the side of it loomed like a billboard against her face. Then it rolled away.

She stood stock still. Her toes were not flattened. Shakily she sat down on the sidewalk and waited through a couple of light changes. Anger bubbled up, rage against the big muscled plumber, whoever he was.

Anger powered her to walk the next few blocks faster, her lungs burning.
After the huge parking lot she approached the Walmart entrance.

Suddenly a guy in tight shiny bicycle shorts, showing off his muscled thighs, ran in front of her to hold open the door. He smiled but barely glanced at her.

“Thanks,” she said, noting his bulging biceps.
She thought, polite guy. Not flirting. I wish he was. Muscles in front of my face again.
What the heck, Mom? First the marshmallows, then your voice, then muscle men? Are you messing with me?

In the produce section she debated over the limp lettuce, the flimsy celery. She dug deep for better specimens.
Some chubby kids milled around their mom nearby.
One big-cheeked boy begged, “Mom, I found Hercules for cheap. Can we get it?”
“You’ve seen that movie how many times?” said the mom.
He squeezed the DVD in his hands. “But it’s a classic new release! Can we get it? Can we?”

Sophie inspected the tomatoes.
The noisy family passed behind her and moved on. One child bumped Sophie’s hip on the way.
Sophie sighed, turned back to her cart, and went looking for honey smoked turkey.

The bleak rack of cold cuts glared at her.
The fragrance of fresh fried chicken wafted in from the deli.
Sophie winced, grabbed a wimpy turkey package, gripped her cart, and forced her feet toward the checkout lines.

Then. On top of her romaine a cartoon Hercules grinned at her with his fist in the air. Argh. Yet another muscle man. Wrong cart, Big-Cheeks.
She didn’t see that family anywhere.

She shoved the DVD into the magazines at the checkout.
Somebody else had put a hand grip squeezer in the magazines.
She hesitated. Picked it up. Squeezed it. She could do this while she watched a movie or surfed the web, maybe. She put it on the conveyor belt with her purchases.

Then the check-out woman had to gush about it. She was pushing seventy but dressed like a teenager. “Oh, these are great! You know we lose muscle the older we get, but we can build it back! I couldn’t open jars anymore, but this grip squeeze gadget brought back my muscles!”

“Good for you,” Sophie said evenly. This lady was like Mom’s soul sister or something.

“Have you ever noticed, everybody leaving the gym is all smiles?” the woman raved.


“Yeah, they say forty minutes of exercise will boost your mood for twelve hours!”

“Imagine that.”

“Right?? Good stuff! No kidding, Kid. You have a lovely day.” She practically tried to shake hands as she gave Sophie her bag.

Another deep breath on her way out of the building.
She murmured, “Geez, Mom, you’re channeling through Walmart employees now or what? Hit me over the head with a two-by-four, why don’t you? Don’t let me get run over on the way home, okay?”

“I won’t,” said Mom, clear as a bell in her right ear.

Sophie smiled and shook her head.

For Health Coaching and inspiration, contact Diane.
(Thanks to wikimedia and public domain for these pics.)

musclebackwoman wikimedia puffyman inside


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